docs/156187: Add bsnmpd to handbook
kaduk at MIT.EDU
Wed Apr 6 23:20:06 UTC 2011
The following reply was made to PR docs/156187; it has been noted by GNATS.
From: Benjamin Kaduk <kaduk at MIT.EDU>
To: Mark Meyer <ofosos at googlemail.com>
Cc: freebsd-gnats-submit at freebsd.org
Subject: Re: docs/156187: Add bsnmpd to handbook
Date: Wed, 6 Apr 2011 19:13:14 -0400 (EDT)
On Wed, 6 Apr 2011, Mark Meyer wrote:
> Thanks for your comments. I attached a revised patch. See below.
> 2011/4/6 Benjamin Kaduk <kaduk at mit.edu>
>> + data. The community will however be transferred in plain text
>>> + over the wire, thus potentially leaking an otherwise secure
>>> + password to an attacker.</para></note>
>> "thus" is perhaps spurious; the whole sentence could probably be reworded
>> to make it more clear that valuable passwords should not be used as they are
>> sent in cleartext.
> Now reads: " Choose the community string wisely. Everyone able to guess it
> will be able to read from your systems management data. The community
> string is transferred in cleartext over the network, potentially leaking a
> valuable password to an attacker."
I think the core thing that was tickling me was "potentially leaking"
versus "potentially valuable". If there is an attacker who can sniff your
network, he *will* read the password. The only question is whether the
password is valuable. Now, this scenario is not universally applicable,
so it is not really grounds for shaping the text.
> Express that the user doesn't want to use the very weak "public", or his/her
> valuable user credentials. Do you have an opinion about starting the third
> sentence with "But"?
I do not think it is correct usage if the surrounding text is unchanged.
To say "[b]ut provided that a unique value is used for the community
string which is not a password elsewhere, the system management data is
the only information leaked" would be correct usage, though rather
> Can you reword to avoid the awkwardness of treating the screenshot as part
>> of the sentence?
> "Start bsnmpd:"
This feels a bit abrupt; I think "To start after system startup, use the
command:" is closer to the prevailing style in existing text.
> Do you have a preference to end the sentence preceding the <screen> in a
> full stop or in a colon?
I personally prefer the colon, and there are examples in the Handbook to
support its use.
> + <screen>&prompt.root; <userinput>/etc/rc.d/bsnmpd
>>> + <para>will start <application>bsnmpd</application>
>>> + immediately. To test your setup, run
>>> + an <application>bsnmpget</application> from the machine you
>>> + installed on.</para>
>> "machine you installed on" is a somewhat awkward phrase.
> I used "your system" elsewhere. The idea that you're doing this locally
> should be evident.
Sure. It would flow more smoothly here to say "on your machine", is my
> Other changes: some markup, removed the word "now" preceding instructions
The capitalization of "RAM" is also inconsistent (it appears as "ram" at
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